For our upcoming trip to Venezuela just Tony and I are going, we would love for the girls to see where I grew up, and meet family that I haven't even seen since we left when I was just a 12 years old but for safety reasons it will just be us.
In preparation for said trip I've taken a lot of time to prepare and think (too much actually, it has me FREAKED out just a little). Actually a lot, so much that I asked the girls this morning "if something were to happen to both mami and papi who they would prefer to live with"? It doesn't help that just last night I watched the movie Life as we know it.
their answers as my mom use to say "straight outta the mouth of babes:
Sierra- Vanessa and Sean Paul
Chloe- Vanessa then grandma
Naomi- grandma. Naomi came back awhile later saying she wanted to change her answer to Vanessa.
Amelia- I forget her name... what's her name?...your sister. me: Vanessa? her: yeaaah,
me: and your second choice? her: Troy and Crystal.
Teresa- I was thinking about Vanessa but I'm not sure. The first time I asked her she said she didn't know after a while she came back to let me know what she thought of.
Rose- Vanessa (she didn't hesitate for even a second, this girl has always known what she wants) I asked her for her second choice also and she told me grandma. She also came back later to tell me she changed her second choice to Christopher "because Gabriella (her cousin) is cute".
Their answers where very interesting to me. Vanessa, my only sister who is 2 years older , has always been my first choice. There are soooo many things I could say about her, she is so very patient, organized, clean, I admire her relationship with her husband (who loves his family so much. I've always watched him and noticed what a hard worker he is, I love to see him play and joke with the kids and how he always puts my sister first). My sister is the best mother/person I've ever known and would be just who I would want for my girls if I wasn't around. I would say my ONLY hesitation is that they have stopped going to church which is not meant to judge in any way!
As of now they are slated to go to Troy and Crystal, Tony's brother and wife. We chose them years ago over my sister,because they are active in church... not so sure that's enough for me anymore. Don't get me wrong, I would be crushed if they didn't grow up in the church and I love Troy and Crystal. I just don't believe THEY are the BEST choice, I don't believe their family dynamics fit with ours.
With this dilemma I am left wondering what to do before I go, change the will or leave it??
if you're bored or curious how bad things are here is a small excerpt from the gov. travel site- VERY interesting stuff!
SAFETY AND SECURITY: Violent crime in Venezuela is pervasive, both in the capital, Caracas, and in the interior. The country’s overall per ca pita murder rate is cited as one of the top five in the world. The Venezuelan National Counter Kidnapping Commission was created in 2006, and since then, official statistics have shown alarming increases in reported kidnappings throughout the country. In fact, kidnappings in 2009 have increased anywhere from 40-60 percent from the previous year. Surveys show that the overwhelming majority of kidnappings and other major crimes are not reported to the police. Armed robberies take place throughout the city, including areas generally presumed safe and frequented by tourists. Well-armed criminal gangs operate widely, often setting up fake police checkpoints. Only a very small percentage of crimes result in trials and convictions.
Travel to and from Maiquetía Airport, the international airport serving Caracas, can be dangerous, and corruption at the airport itself is rampant. Both arriving and departing travelers, including foreigners, have been victims of personal property theft and muggings in the airport. The embassy has received multiple, credible reports that individuals wearing what appear to be official uniforms or other credentials are involved in facilitating or perpetrating these crimes. For this reason, U.S. citizen travelers should be wary of all strangers, even those in official uniform or carrying official identification, and should not pack valuable items or documents in checked luggage. Valuable documents and personal items should be kept in carry-on luggage. The embassy has also received multiple, credible reports of victims of “express kidnappings” occurring at the airport, in which individuals are taken to make purchases or to withdraw as much money as possible from ATMs, often at gunpoint. Furthermore, there are known drug trafficking groups working from the airport. Travelers should not accept packages from anyone and should keep their luggage with them at all times.
The embassy also has received reports of uniformed airport officials attempting to extort money from travelers, including U.S. citizens, as they go through the normal check-in and boarding process for departing flights. Other reports from U.S. citizens and U.S. government officials state that uniformed individuals have approached travelers immediately upon entering the terminal when exiting Venezuela through Maiquetia Airport. These uniformed individuals reportedly may ask travelers where they are traveling and then escort them to a separate area to inspect their bags for illegal drugs or money. In certain cases U.S. citizens have reported that they were forced to sign documents in Spanish that they did not understand. Travelers should not sign documents that they do not understand, but if they feel they must, they should sign “I do not understand this document” or “I cannot read the above statement” as part of their signature.
The road between Maiquetía Airport and Caracas is known to be particularly dangerous. Visitors traveling this route at night have been kidnapped and held captive for ransom in roadside huts that line the highway. Because of the frequency of robberies at gunpoint, travelers are encouraged to arrive and depart only during daylight hours. If not, travelers should use extra care both within and outside the airport. The embassy strongly advises that all arriving passengers make advance plans for transportation from the airport to their place of lodging. If possible, travelers should arrange to be picked up at the airport by someone who is known to them or at least try to caravan in known groups en route to Caracas. Travelers should be aware of chokepoints inside tunnels and avoid obstacles in the road.
The embassy has received frequent reports of armed robberies in taxicabs going to and from the airport at Maiquetía. There is no foolproof method of knowing whether a taxi driver at the airport is reliable. The fact that a taxi driver presents a credential or drives an automobile with official taxi license plates marked libre is no longer an indication of reliability. Incidents of taxi drivers in Caracas overcharging, robbing, and injuring passengers are common. Travelers should take care to use radio-dispatched taxis or those from reputable hotels. Travelers should call a 24-hour radio-dispatched taxi service from a public phone lobby or ask hotel, restaurant, or airline representatives to contact a licensed cab company for them.
While visiting Venezuela, U.S. citizens are encouraged to carry as little U.S. currency as possible and to avoid wearing expensive or flashy watches and jewelry. Due to the poor security situation, the embassy does not recommend changing money at the international airport. Visitors should bring a major credit card, but should be aware of widespread pilfering of credit card data to make unauthorized transactions. Travelers’ checks are not recommended as they are honored in only a few locations. It is possible to exchange U.S. currency at approved exchange offices near major hotel chains in Caracas (personal checks are not accepted) and at commercial banks with some restrictions. Due to currency regulations, hotels cannot provide currency exchange. There are ATMs throughout Venezuela. Malfunctions are common, however, and travelers should be careful to use only those in well-lit public places. ATM data has also been hacked and used to make unauthorized withdrawals from user’s accounts. ATMs are also targeted by street gangs in order to rob people making withdrawals.
4 comments:
Nadezda - you go with your gut and prayer where your kids are concerned. If Vanessa is the choice, change your Will and specify you wish the children are raised in the Church. Make your desires known to her. You never know what a blessing that could be in her life if something were to happen. The last thing you need to do is leave worried about the life your children will have if something were to happen. You want to go feeling at peace.
I love you friend and will pray for you both and your family while you are away.
It would be our highest honor to be entrusted with the care of God’s most precious gift to you, your children. We love them each so much and would give them all of our love unconditionally. No matter who you chose for them to live with, please know we would make additional efforts to be more involved in their lives, and help them continue to know that they are loved and that they will be reunited with you and Tony again someday in our Father’s heavenly kingdom.
You know what is best for your children, but if it were me, I would think keeping them in Colorado to be near Tony’s parents and Troy & his family would be the best thing for your kids. Ideally, perhaps Tony’s parents might even be able to move in with your kids at your house so as to not disrupt the kids’ lives. Your kids could also keep the many friendships they’ve made at school and church.
For my own selfish reasons, I would be so happy to have your kids in our lives. I always wanted a big family, but as you know Vanessa and I had our struggles having children. While we have a full life with our three kids, it still feels at times like the house is empty. Maybe it is because I grew up with 13 brothers and sisters, I think having 9 in all would be a whole lot of fun. When there’s lots of kids, there’s always enough people around to play a fun game of hide and seek, kickball, or whatever.
I understand your concern about Vanessa and me not going to church anymore. I once felt as strongly as you do. No matter how much love a family may have, what good is it if your kids lose their way spiritually and are unable to be with you in the eternities? If you needed us to make sure they kept going to church and participated in all the church activities, I can promise you that we would do that. We would do everything in our power to help them keep their testimonies. Please also know that we have always continued to pray every day as a family and also say our personal prayers. Both Vanessa and I continue to honor our marriage covenants and strive to create a home environment where the Spirit can thrive. Know also that we believe in God and have faith that we will all be gathered again someday with your mother and all of the others in our family in the presence of God. We also would never belittle the church or speak ill of its teachings or leaders and would encourage your children to follow their hearts in following the Lord.
That article is so scary!! I hope you guys have a very very safe time!
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